


Seeing Stars

by LadyLokiLaufeyson



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Rock Band, Angst, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Enemies to Lovers, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-31
Updated: 2016-05-31
Packaged: 2018-07-11 07:12:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,829
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7035286
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyLokiLaufeyson/pseuds/LadyLokiLaufeyson
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The child of a high ranking politician and a war hero, the grandson of a rock pioneer, the nephew of a revered astrophysicist, and a rockstar in his own right, Kylo Ren is accustomed to two things: living his life in the public eye and getting what he wants. When Ren’s long time manager and mentor, Snoke, steps down to try and recruit an up and coming band; he leaves the shady Brendol Hux II in his stead. Kylo is fiendishly fascinated with the man, while Brendol would rather be anywhere than around Kylo. But it all changes when there’s a shift in the relationship - and the two are suddenly caught up in a whirlwind romance. But will the strain of fame be too much for Brendol and is Kylo truly ready to bear his heart and commit to Brendol?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. I

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the Kylux Big Bang on tumblr. This is my first time participating in a Big Bang ever and I'm very excited to finally reveal my fic to the world! It's been fun.
> 
> Art for this fic was done by the amazing [iwanttoplayguitar](https://iwanttoplayguitar.tumblr.com). The art is inserted into it's corresponding chapter!
> 
> Title comes from the song [Seeing Stars](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l_Aij93GQnM) by BØRNS.
> 
> I hope everyone enjoys the fic <3

If you asked him, Kylo Ren - formerly known as Ben Breha Organa-Solo - would say that his life was rather simple and could be summed up in a series of snapshots. 

 

Like, literal snapshots.

 

First, you’d have the picture of him that graced the cover of the biggest gossip magazine at the time. Only a few days old and shit all ugly, the birth of the son of politician Leia Organa and army fighter Han Solo was national news nevertheless. Kylo still sees that wretched cover every now and again, the smiling face of his mother cradling him in her arms and his father’s cocky smile only serving as a bitter reminder of the family he left behind.

 

Next, you’d have the now famous picture of him being led out of the courthouse by his longtime mentor when he’d finally secured legal emancipation from his parents at age 16. The picture showed Kylo leaning into his mentor (he was still hung over from an earlier party) as they waded their way through a swarm of incessant paparazzi, reporters, and fans. There was apparently something about Kylo’s messy hair, dark sunglasses, dishevelled dress suit, and lack of sobriety in the picture that made him the poster boy for teenage rebellion and freedom. Lots of kids wanted to be free from their parents, but Kylo had actually  _ done _ it. Teenagers still came up to him today, 10 years later, and asked what had felt like to ‘be free’. He’d laugh and give them the expected rockstar answer:  _ ‘It was the most liberating thing I’d ever done!’ ‘best decision of my life!’ ‘fuck them!’ _ ; but on the inside it had felt like nothing more than a strange emptiness.

 

Last, you’d probably have the cover of the KNVGHTS OF RVN’s debut studio album, produced by First Order Records. The cover is dramatic, depicting Ren’s torso covered in blood with the words ‘free of this pain’ carved into his skin. His long, bony hands claw at his chest in the image, as if trying to tear his own heart out. Uptight Christian parents from the Bible belt protested the album, as expected, but the general public gobbled it up. People were interested to see how the former child prodigy would size up as a frontman compared to his grandfather and teenagers were looking for a new symbol of chaos to latch onto.

 

If you told Kylo that it was sad that his life could be summed up in so few events, he’d laugh and flick his cigarette at you. He knew people liked to talk about all the filler stuff between those events. The years he spent as the world’s cutest toddler - the son of a politician and a decorated army pilot; the grandson of a rock legend and his secret wife; the nephew of an award winning astrophysicist. The years he spent as a child prodigy - playing Chopin at 5 and Ravel at 10. The years after his emancipation that he spent with his childhood tutor and now manager, Snoke - Snoke had taken Kylo under his wing and released him back into the world a few years later with a whole new public persona; where Kylo had simply been a moody teenager before, he was now the bad boy frontman with a heart of stone.

 

“Maybe life wasn’t fucking meant to be prolific. I didn’t escape my mom’s womb with the intent to be shit except what I am. Other people, they may break my life so far down into 10, 20, 30 parts. Hell, they probably already have - just turn on a fucking T.V. or pick up a magazine. I’m fucking everywhere. But those three events, those three things, that’s how I see my life. And I could give a shit what everyone else thinks because in the end,  _ I’m _ the one who wakes up and lives  _ my _ life every day,”.

 

~

 

Kylo Ren definitely wouldn’t count the day he met Brendol Hux II as one of the highlights of his life. He spared Snoke’s fill-in a little more than an appraising glance before going back to his conversation with Phasma, not finding anything particularly special about the redhead standing in front of them.

 

Well, maybe his fucking  _ loud _ clothes. 

 

Glittery gold jacket, pants, and shoes. Mesh shirt. Bright red hair slicked back with way too much hair gel. Ray Bans. Thick gold chain. 

 

The outfit alone was honestly enough to make Kylo break his uncaring facade and turn back to the man. 

 

Kylo snapped his fingers as he approached the man “What’s your name again?” he asked

 

Hux stuck out a well manicured hand for a shake “Brendol Hux II,” he said smoothly.

 

“A pleasure, Brendol,” Kylo said sarcastically, shaking the other man’s hand.

 

Hux waved a hand dismissively “Please, Brendol was my father. Call me Hux,”

 

“Ah,” Kylo said, still taking in the man standing in front of him.

 

Hux took a drink from his venti coffee that he held in his other hand before setting it down and clapping his hands together.

 

“Well, I’m excited to be here with you and I can’t wait for you to show me what you can do,” he said.

 

~

 

Hux was not excited to be here. 

 

Of all the bands in the world, he got stuck with the poster children for emo culture. For the outcasts of society that had nothing to do with their lives. For the unkempt, disorderly masses. 

 

And he had to manage them...worst of all, he had to manage  _ Kylo Ren _ .

 

Hux secretly hated Snoke for sticking him with that petulant manchild. Kylo was nothing more than an ungrateful child with a big ego in Hux’s mind, but Hux knew he would have to grit his teeth and bear it. You didn’t get this far in the industry without making some sacrifices. 

 

Hux looked over to where Kylo was currently using a lyric sheet that he’d set on fire to light his cigarette.

 

“Kylo, this is a no smoking zone,” Hux said, pointing at the sign by the doorway.

 

“Ask me if I care,” Kylo said, flicking cigarette ash onto Hux’s jacket as he sauntered by him.

 

Hux sighed internally and began looking through his phone for the rest of today’s schedule. After making sure he was on track for the day, he opened his contacts and his thumb idled over the number for his family’s most trusted hitman. 

 

_ ‘Not today, Hux; it’s just your first day - save the hitman for later,’ _ Hux thought to himself before sighing resignedly and slipping his phone into his back pocket.

 

He looked around the room before refocusing on Kylo, who seemed to be watching him intently.

 

“What?” he snapped, betraying his cool facade.

 

Kylo smirked at him. “Nothing,” he said. 

 

Hux hated him.


	2. II

KNVGHTS’ forthcoming album was set to be released in a month’s time, so they were all required to work the press circuit. Kylo would undeniably be asked questions about how he felt about Snoke’s absence ( _ “It’s different without him but I trust what he’s doing,” _ ), Phasma would be asked about the recent dating rumors that swirled around her ( _ “Come on, man, ask me about my newly issued custom guitar - shouldn’t that more interesting to a music magazine than who I’m fucking?” _ ), and Dopheld wouldn’t be asked anything because nobody cared about him (so was the life of the least popular member of the band).

 

Once they were finished with all interviews with magazines, appearances on talk shows, and the occasional foreign game show appearance; the band would be heading out on a massive world tour. 

 

“Kylo, the set designer dropped these off today and he wants to know your opinion on the stage set up - Phasma and Dopheld have already given their input but we need yours,” Hux said, laying a tablet in front of Kylo that showcased various flashy stage designs.

 

“This one,” Kylo said, pointing at a random one and pushing the device back towards Hux.

Hux scowled and pushed it back. “You barely looked at it. You’re the frontman of this band and the design needs to radiate  _ you _ ,” 

 

Kylo fixed Hux with a bored gaze and slowly raked his eyes back down to the tablet. He scrolled through the pictures for a minute before turning it back to Hux. “This one,” he said.

 

“Great, thank you for actually making an effort,” Hux said, starting to get up.

 

“Wait, actually, not that one,” Kylo said, dragging the tablet back towards him. “That one...it just isn’t  _ me _ ,” he continued, mimicking Hux’s words from before.

 

Hux sighed and got comfortable in his chair again. He pulled out his phone and checked his email. There was a lengthy message from Snoke, detailing what he’d been doing. The highlights were that Snoke had procured Hux and the KNVGHTS invitations to the Grammys (which they were  _ required _ to go to, it was good for publicity), the band that Snoke had been trying to sign turned him down but he was still trying to work with them, and that the KNVGHTS were going to enter into a public feud with The Resistance but then make up with them at the Grammys (it’s good for publicity, Snoke assured him). Hux sighed louder this time and scrubbed a hand over his face. Even from afar, Snoke was still controlling everything they did. Hux didn’t see what his point there was if Snoke could just send Kylo an email telling him to act out for a few days like he did so well. 

 

“I’ve chosen now,” Kylo said, sliding the tablet back to Hux, a new picture selected this time.

 

Hux stood up quickly and scooped it up so Kylo couldn’t change his mind again. “Great, thanks,” he said as he started to walk away.

 

“Wait!” Kylo called just as he’d reached the door.

 

Hux turned around impatiently and raised his eyebrow “Yes?”

 

“I don’t know if that one  _ really _ reflects my artistic vision, let me choose a different one,”

 

Hux’s fingers tightened where he was holding the slim tablet and he slowly turned to face Kylo, smiling tightly and silently simmering. He made his way back over to Kylo and slammed the tablet back down in front of him. “Fine, go ahead, take all day for all I care. It’s not like we have anything else to do in a day!” Hux snapped. 

 

Kylo rolled his eyes at Hux, picking up the tablet and leaning back in his chair. Hux sat back down as well and decided to discuss Snoke’s email with Kylo. 

 

“So, Snoke has said you and your bandmates will enter into a public argu-”

 

“-ment with The Resistance” Kylo finished “I know,”

 

Hux scowled “Well, he only just told me,” 

 

Kylo looked up at him. “And you thought he wouldn’t tell  _ me _ , his golden child, before  _ you _ , a lowly little stand-in?” 

 

Hux dug his fingernails into his palms to refrain from saying something he’d regret. “Wow, ‘golden child’, really? You’re even more conceited than I thought,”

 

“Well, it’s what he calls me,” Kylo said sincerely 

 

Hux froze for a second, startled by Kylo’s sudden sincerity and how he looked a bit confused, his pink lips curling down in a slight frown and his dark eyebrows turned down, his forehead creasing. Hux distantly wondered how long Snoke had been drilling that into Kylo’s head.  _ ‘Probably his entire life,’ _ Hux thought. He didn’t voice this though, just pointed a finger down at the tablet in a silent gesture for Kylo to make a decision. 

 

Kylo slid it back to him, his first choice on the screen. 

 

“This is the one you wanted all along? Why didn’t you just say so?” Hux asked, puzzled.

 

“To humor you,” Kylo replied, lighting a cigarette and closing his eyes.

 

That man was going to be the death of Hux.

 

~

 

Kylo had done it to humor Hux. Or, rather, watch the way the tips of his ears went red when he was getting upset, how his neck would flush in anger, and how he’d squeeze his hands into fists as a paltry form of self-control. These were all things Kylo had noticed about the man over the last few weeks, but Hux hadn’t noticed that Kylo had noticed. 

 

He continued to smoke, head tilted back, eyes closed. He could feel Hux’s gaze on him and he exhaled a puff of smoke. “Is there anything else?” He asked, a bored tone to his voice that he’d perfected over the years. It was better if people thought you didn’t care about anything than to let them know you cared about everything.

 

“No, that’ll be all,” Hux said, sounding resigned.

 

Kylo waited to hear Hux slide his chair back in and turn around before he cracked an eye open to watch Hux leave (or rather, watch Hux’s butt). When Hux was gone, Kylo smirked to himself and went back to his cigarette. 

 

He’d get him yet.


	3. III

A few months passed, press tours were completed, and finally the KNVGHTS had hit the road. It was opening night and Hux could practically feel the energy vibrating off Kylo as he sat backstage, clothed in a dark robe and jiggling his leg impatiently. “Don’t rattle yourself right out of that chair,” Hux remarked as the motion became distracting. 

 

Kylo scowled. “Don’t you have anything better to do than fuss over little old me?” He asked, peeling his scowl up into a sardonic smirk. 

 

“How I wish I did,” Hux cut back. “And what’s with that robe, anyway?” He continued, gesturing towards the plush robe Kylo wore.

 

“Hides my outfit,” Kylo replied

 

“Ah, yes, how insightful. Well, I hope it at least even vaguely matches what the others are wearing - you know it would’ve been so much better if you’d approved a designer for your stage outfits like the others did,” Hux rambled.

 

“Well, when have you ever known  _ me _ to make things  _ easy _ ?” Kylo said, getting up and dropping his robe to reveal his bare chest and skin tight leggings. He stood there before Hux like Venus in all her glory - or maybe Narcissus, beautiful but fated to be devoured by his own vanity. 

 

Hux rolled his eyes and looked away, hoping Kylo wouldn’t notice the flush that rose up on his cheeks. Hux heard Kylo chuckle deeply, but before either one of them could say anything, there was a loud knock on the door that signalled it was showtime. 

 

Hux followed behind the KNVGHTS as they made their way to the stage entrance. He cordially wished them each good luck as they each made their way onstage. Kylo was the last to go on and he paused in front of Hux before going out. 

 

“I’ll see you after the show,” Kylo said, sliding his signature dark sunglasses onto his face before walking through the curtains to the adoring cheers of his thousands of fans. 

 

~

 

Kylo was absolutely  _ electric _ onstage. Hux had seen videos of the man performing before but it was nothing compared to seeing him in person. 

 

Everything he did radiated energy and a barely contained anger at the world. He stomped his heavy black boots on the stage to rile the crowd up, he threw his microphone stand around the stage, he wrapped the microphone cord around his neck and pretended to choke himself, he bent over backwards in a particularly painful looking move, and he’d even incorporated flawless backflips into his routine. 

 

But what really made Hux take notice of Kylo in the end was how  _ good _ he looked. He’d taken off his sunglasses, exposing his wild, almost hungry looking eyes. He was shirtless and his chest gleamed with sweat under the lighting. The leather leggings were the real kicker though - they hung low on his hips and clung tightly to his legs - his  _ very nice _ legs. Hux found himself unable to tear his eyes off the other man, hanging onto every word and every movement as if he were one of the rabid fans in the audience. 

 

When the show ended Hux was mildly disappointed before he realized that he’d get to see Kylo do this  _ every _ night. He smirked to himself as Kylo said his goodnights to the audience and staggered backstage, one arm wrapped around Mitaka and the other around Phasma - probably for good showmanship, as Hux had never seen him willingly touch anybody.

 

“Great show, keep that up and you’ll be the most coveted headliner in the world,” Hux congratulated the band when they got backstage. 

 

“Praise from you, I never thought I’d see the day,” Kylo said dryly as he slung a towel over his shoulder “but there’s a first time for everything right?”.

 

~

 

It was another few weeks before it all came crashing down. The carefully built facade that Hux and Kylo (but mostly Hux) had put up to hide the fact that they were both wildly attracted to each other was torn down in a matter of eventful seconds backstage.

 

The KNVGHTS had finished their show as usual, and everyone had broken off into their own individual dressing rooms to change. Except for Kylo, who’d laced a finger through the strap on the shoulder of Hux’s coat and tugged him into the dressing room with him.

 

“What - “ Hux started, turning to face the other man.

 

Kylo titled his head and looked at Hux, breathing heavily from exerting himself onstage. He licked his lips as he raked his eyes up and down Hux’s body. Taking a step closer to Hux, he pinned him to the wall.

 

“I really wanna kiss you right now,” he said, something in his voice that Hux had never heard before.

 

Hux looked at him and nodded and suddenly Kylo’s warm mouth was on his and Hux would be lying if he said it wasn’t the hottest thing in the world.

 

“Come to my hotel room when you’re ready,” Kylo said, breaking the kiss and pressing something into Hux’s palm before turning and sashaying away.

 

Hux looked down into his palm and saw a key card to Kylo’s room.  _ ‘Oh, this is going to be a  _ **_very_ ** _ good night,’ _ he thought to himself as he slipped the card into his pocket and smiled smugly. 

 

~

 

It was a few more days into their... _ whatever  _ this was, before Hux finally cracked and had to ask Kylo something that’d been on his mind for a while now. He knew there’d always been rumors of Kylo’s sexuality, and there’d even been pictures of him kissing guys, but he’d never given a definitive answer. 

 

Hux sat up and faced Kylo, grabbing the cigarette from between Kylo’s lips and putting it into his own. He took a drag before handing it back to Kylo and fixing him with a placated stare.

 

“Yes?” Kylo asked

 

“Are you gay?” Hux asked bluntly

 

Kylo smirked around his cigarette. “Are  _ you _ ?” He retorted.

 

“I asked you first,” Hux said back

 

“The reply of a child,” Kylo said thoughtfully, taking another drag of his cigarette “perhaps a child too afraid of himself,”

 

Hux sighed and rolled his eyes “Well it’s not like being gay gets you any extra points in the Mafia,”

 

Kylo laughed. “Is that a yes?” He asked.

 

Hux sighed and scrubbed his hands over his face. “Yes, it’s a yes. I’m gay. There, now what about you?” Hux replied.

 

“Bisexual,” Kylo said simply

 

Hux nodded.

 

“That gonna be a problem?” Kylo asked, his eyes now closed and his shoulders tense. 

 

Hux felt a pang in his heart as he wondered if Kylo had had this same discussion before, in another hotel room, with another lover, and been turned down because of his sexuality. Hux leaned over and wrapped his arms around Kylo. “No, it’s not a problem at all,” he said as he smoothed the other man’s dark hair back. 

 

“Good,” Kylo said, discarding his cigarette and cuddling into Hux. “Good,”.


	4. IV

Hux straightened out his bowtie in the hotel mirror as Kylo stood next to him, brushing his cheeks over with gold glitter that matched his golden contacts. Grammys night had finally come around and Hux’s tensions were high for a couple of reasons. The first being that he hoped Kylo could execute Snoke’s reveal plan properly and the second being that it would be he and Kylo’s first real public appearance together. There had already been countless tabloid rumors about the nature of their relationship - especially when they were both pictured leaving clubs together or eating at fancy restaurants alone. Hux had ignored the endless stream of questions from reporters and brushed it off as managerial fraternization when he’d gotten a scathing phone call from his father.

 

The embittered call from Hux’s father served as a harsh reminder of the situation Hux was in. He had no idea if he could ever even be out with Kylo. Hux shook his head to refocus. He had more important things to deal with; and besides - he didn’t even know where he and Kylo’s relationship stood. Were they dating? Were they friends with benefits? Was Hux just something pretty for Kylo to wear on his arm? 

 

“Kylo,” Hux started, still fidgeting with his tie.

 

“Yes?” Kylo replied.

 

“What are we?” Hux asked, turning to face Kylo.

 

“Divine,” Kylo answered.

 

Kylo turned as well and peered out at Hux from behind his dark bangs, his golden eyes shimmering. Hux had to admit it was a haunting look, even if the contacts were horrendously ugly. 

 

“Ever the dramatist,” Hux said, punctuating his statement with an eyeroll and an exasperated shake of his head.

 

Kylo snapped his makeup case shut and collected various items from the messy counter: his phone, his keys, his wallet and shoved them into his pockets.

 

“Ready?” Kylo asked, catching Hux’s body in his arms and pressing a quick kiss to his lips. 

 

“As I’ll ever be,” Hux replied, smiling tightly and trying to ignore the anxious thrum in his chest.

 

~

 

On the red carpet Kylo posed with his bandmates, responding tactfully to the photographers’ urgent shouts for him to turn his head this way and that. Hux tried to keep his distance from the group, but Kylo waved him over as his bandmates broke apart to pose for solo portraits. Hux stood next to Kylo, hands behind his back. Kylo casually snaked an arm around Hux’s waist and forced Hux to uncross them and wrap an arm around Kylo in the most we’re-totally-heterosexual way possible. Kylo was not so intent on hiding though, as he leaned further and further into Hux, pressing himself into Hux’s side. 

 

Kylo broke away as The Resistance trailed onto the red carpet beside them. Hux eyed them, all of them dressed in loud oranges and bright whites - a stark contrast to the deep blacks, monochrome silvers, and sun golds that the KNVGHTS donned.

 

Rey, the frontwoman, was wearing a bright orange rubber jumpsuit with the stomach cut out to reveal her toned midriff. Jessika, the bassist, was wearing a matching strapless dress that hugged her frame and only went to mid-thigh length. Finn and Poe, the drummer and guitarist, respectively, were both wearing matching jackets coupled with bright orange pants so tight they put Kylo’s skinny jeans to shame. 

 

Rey and Jessika were known to be dating, so Hux shouldn’t have been so surprised when Jessika planted a kiss on Rey right in front of the photographers, but he still was. They were so... _ comfortable _ . The affection Rey and Jessika showed towards each other caused something to tug at Hux’s heartstrings, and he was caught in a rare moment of regret that he pushed Kylo away earlier. It was in that moment that Hux realized he didn’t care - what his father thought, what the media thought, what the Mafia thought, what anybody thought. 

 

He wanted to be with Kylo, he wanted to be out with Kylo, and anybody who opposed that could go screw themselves. 

 

And most of all, Hux realized, he wanted to be  _ happy _ . 

 

~

 

The Resistance came up to them backstage and made small talk as they waited for the real action to happen. Hux had actually known Finn from one of his earlier groups that Hux had managed for a time, and Kylo turned out to know Poe because, to Hux’s surprise, they had grown up together. Hux had been in the middle of listening to Poe tell an animated story involving him and Finn when Rey finally appeared.

 

“Hey Ky,” Rey said, greeting him first.

 

“Sister,” Kylo said mildly, draping a loose arm over Rey’s shoulder and quickly pressing himself into her as a lousy excuse for a hug. 

 

Hux sputtered. “Sister?” he questioned, baffled.

 

“Rey, Hux. Hux, Rey.” Kylo said, brushing off Hux’s question.

 

Hux stiffly took Rey’s hand “Lovely to meet you, but  _ sister _ \- wow, that’s quite the shock,”

 

Rey laughed. “Well, we’re siblings by blood but cousins by choice. My uncle raised me,” Rey explained.

 

Hux nodded, not wanting to get into the specifics. And he’d thought  _ his _ family was weird.

 

“So, are you ready for our grand bombshell dropping?” Kylo said exaggeratedly to Rey. 

 

Rey laughed again, bearing all her teeth. “Yes, can’t wait,” she said, looping an arm through Kylo’s which was quickly shrugged off.

 

~

 

“And the winner is - KNVGHTS OF REN!” The presenter shouted enthusiastically. The camera panned to Kylo, who never betrayed his cool facade as he and his bandmates went up onstage to receive the award. Kylo let Phasma and Dopheld give their thanks first before he took the microphone himself.

 

“Uh, wow...I’m really honored to have this award and all. I wouldn’t have it without my bandmates - Dopheld and Phasma, my incredible mentor Snoke, and of course my new manager Hux,” Kylo started, gesturing to Hux in the audience.

 

Hux unclenched his hands from where he’d been digging his fingernails into his palms, silently grateful that Kylo didn’t say anything too suspicious about them - he wanted to be out, but he wanted it to be on his own terms.

 

“And before I go there’s just one more person I want to thank, and also give an apology to...and that’s my sister, Rey. Rey, would you come up here?” Kylo said, looking at Rey where she sat between Finn and Poe.

 

A shocked gasp rippled through the audience as Rey climbed up the stairs to join her brother onstage. 

 

_ ‘Holy shit!’ _

 

_ ‘It can’t be!’ _

 

_ ‘Weren’t they just fighting like cats?’ _

 

Hux smiled to himself. Despite being a bit... _ overbearing _ ...Hux had to admit, Snoke was an excellent tactician. People would be talking about this for months. Any second Hux’s phone would start blowing up, magazines begging for interviews and high ups demanding if he’d known about this. 

 

Rey looped her arm through Kylo’s again and this time he let her hold onto him. The two both wore smug, laughing smiles as they stood arm-in-arm onstage.

 

“So, you said you had something to say to me? It started with an  _ ‘I’m’ _ ?” Rey said

 

Kylo laughed and turned to look down at his shorter sibling “I’m sorrrry,” he replied

 

“I forgive you, brother,” Rey said teasingly as the music started playing them off. The two of them waved to the crowd and exited to the backstage to the sound of deafening claps and hoots.

 

~ 

 

Backstage and the afterparty were absolute madness, to say the least. Everyone wanted the scoop on Kylo and Rey, and it seemed as if every photographer in the world was trying to get a photo of them. 

 

He and Kylo were currently making their way down the sidewalk to someone or other’s party, Hux trying to dodge the attention because even the news of Rey and Kylo’s relation didn’t take everyone’s mind off the rumors of the nature of Hux and Kylo’s relationship. A camera pop went off in Hux’s eyes, nearly blinding him. He could see now why Kylo constantly wore his dark sunglasses.

 

The paparazzi and fans were swarming them from all sides, but Kylo took it all in stride. He meandered his way down the sidewalk and posed for pictures with screaming girls like it was a normal day.

 

But it  _ was _ a normal day for Kylo, Hux reminded himself - all of this - the screaming, the press hounds, and the general chaos was all Kylo knew. He was born in the spotlight and was more than willing to take his place in infamy - a major change from the life Hux had known. 

 

The excessive life was lived in private, for Hux and his family at least. In the Mafia, it was about being quiet, doing things in the dark, making sure only your closest associates knew your whereabouts. Of course there were other gangsters who prefered to be bold and open about what they did - proud of their accomplishments, but Brendol Hux I stressed complete secrecy. He’d built too much to jeopardize his crime empire for a taste of the limelight. More than once Hux didn’t even know where his own father was himself.

 

Of course, there were always rumors, especially when Hux started his managing career and his background was questioned. But Brendol Hux I had always assured that those questioners had conveniently gone away. But there would be no “quick fix” and “convenient disappearance” once Hux came out. You couldn’t put out a hit on the entire world, after all. And in a twisted way, that encouraged Hux in his next move. 

 

He slipped his hand into Kylo’s as they walked, Kylo looked over at him, surprised, but then grinned devilishly. The noise of the photographers and the negative noise in Hux’s head all seemed to fade into the background as they walked, shoulder to shoulder, them against the world.


	5. V

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for referenced CSA/child abuse in this chapter.
> 
> [Michael](http://66.media.tumblr.com/a37ad393eeed5f84b770b902240c801b/tumblr_nohtypHdZs1tcxkqzo1_1280.jpg) [Shannon](http://cdn6.levineleavitt.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/dcimage11.jpg) is my fancast for human!Snoke.

It was a break week for the KNVGHTS before they started up on the second leg of their tour, and Phasma and Dopheld had returned home to their families for the time being. Hux wondered how that made Kylo feel, to see his bandmates eager to return to their families when he valued his own family so little. Hux didn’t ask, and Kylo never brought it up.

 

Hux’s thoughts were broken by his phone chiming and he looked down to see a text from Kylo. Hux’s breath hitched as he read the text. And read it again. And again. 

 

_ ‘Han Solo is dead’ _ .

 

~

 

Kylo greeted Hux at the door of his hotel room, glassy eyed but still committed to his look apparently. He was wearing a torn grey shirt with Anakin’s face on it, a pair of laced up leather leggings, and when he opened his mouth to speak - good god, was he wearing  _ grills _ ? 

 

“Kylo, did you kill Han?” Hux said, barging past Kylo and into the room. 

 

Kylo’s mouth dropped open, exposing what Hux now recognized to be silver grills fashioned into vampire fangs. “You thought I killed him?!” Kylo exclaimed, standing in the middle of his hotel room, and throwing his hands into the air.

 

“You sent me a text saying ‘Han Solo is dead’! That sounds like you killed him!” Hux hissed at Kylo

 

“Killed him? No! I haven’t seen him in over a fucking decade,” Kylo wailed, his voice cracking at the end of the sentence. It was then that Hux actually began to take in his surroundings, and he realized that the hotel room had been completely and utterly trashed.

 

Furniture was upturned, pillows had been ripped open, lamps had been broken, all the contents of the minibar were strewn across the walls, and there was a spiderweb crack in the bay window. 

 

“Kylo,” Hux said, his voice softening as he turned back to the other man “you’re sad about this, aren’t you?”. 

 

Kylo said nothing as he stepped in close to Hux, head down, and wrapped his arms around his waist. He leaned his head on the other man’s shoulder and took a few shaky exhales as Hux rubbed his back reassuringly. 

 

“Come to the funeral with me,” Kylo said, more a demand than a question.

 

“Yes, anything,” Hux agreed, bringing a hand up to hold Kylo’s head. He pressed a kiss into Kylo’s temple and wondered how they got here.

 

~

 

Han Solo’s funeral was held on a bright, sunny day in New York. Kylo served as a pallbearer and looked like he was being crushed by the weight of his duty. Maybe it was guilt coming back to bite him in the ass. Kylo walked solemnly alongside his mother Leia, flanked by Rey and Luke, and brought up in the back by Han’s war friends Lando and C.B. Hux watched on the sidelines as they carried the casket to the burial site. There were cameras filming them from every angle, the entire funeral being broadcast live across the world. Hux thought it was terribly intrusive, but the Skywalker line was never one to go for subtlety and Han had been one of the most revered war heroes in history, in addition to being married to Leia. 

 

When the time to give eulogies came, Leia went first and spoke of how she could never have asked for a more amazing husband and father to her children. Lando went next, telling a war story about the two of them and commending Han for his bravery and friendship. The second to last person to speak was Luke, who talked about what an amazing brother in law Han had been and thanking him for bringing Rey into his life. And finally, it was Kylo’s turn to speak. Hux (and probably the rest of the world) waited with bated breath to see what the prodigal son would say after all these years. 

 

There were 5 agonizing minutes of dead silence before Kylo leaned over the microphone and whispered “Thank you,” before turning and exiting the stage. Across from Hux, Leia watched tight lipped as her son casually rejoined the group. Hux didn’t know Leia, but he felt like Kylo would be getting an earful from Leia about his behavior once they were away from the cameras. 

 

As people began to break off into their own little groups, Hux approached Kylo. He was standing by a sobbing Rey who was being held tightly by Jessika. A little to the side, Poe stood looking like he was a million miles away as a teary eyed Finn leaned into him. Hux gingerly (and somewhat awkwardly) put his hand on Kylo’s shoulder; Kylo reached up and Hux thought he’d brush his hand away, but instead Kylo took it in his own so the two of them were holding hands. 

 

“Will you be alright?” Hux asked, looking into Kylo’s chocolate eyes.

 

“I have to be,” Kylo said, the wind sweeping his hair into his eyes. 

 

Hux silently nodded and stood with Kylo until every last mourner and cameraman had left the graveyard, and Kylo finally let himself collapse to his knees, sobbing and shrieking wretchedly as if he were being torn apart from the inside out.

 

~

 

Snoke appeared the next day, at a family gathering being held at Ren’s childhood home. Hux could see that Leia was clearly displeased with Snoke’s appearance, as she made no move to hide her disgust as the man stepped through the threshold of the door. Hux saw her make a few quick remarks to him, which Snoke only curled the side of his mouth up at before scanning the room, presumably looking for Kylo. His eyes caught on Hux and he smiled genially, making his way over to him.

 

Snoke was a tall man with dark, dyed hair and a severe face that was only accentuated by the deep crease lines that time had carved into his features. Snoke moved through the crowd like a serpent, his dark eyes hard and calculating.

 

“Brendol, it’s a pleasure to see you. I’ve been busy lately, perhaps too much so,” Snoke said cryptically, eyeing Hux.

 

“It’s great to see you too sir,” Hux replied, brushing off Snoke’s words to analyze at a later time.

 

“Tell me, where is Kylo?” Snoke asked, giving the crowd a once over “I don’t see him anywhere”

 

“Guess who,” Kylo said, coming up from behind Snoke and covering the man’s eyes with his hands.

 

“Kylo, my boy,” Snoke said, turning to embrace Kylo, his hands lingering on Kylo’s back for just a second too long. 

 

Despite working for the man, Hux definitely didn’t know Snoke on the personal level that Kylo did. Hux would admit, the relationship between the two of them was odd. He shifted as the pair leaned in close and whispered to each other, something oddly intimate about them that made Hux uneasy. For a man that had known Kylo all his life, and even brought him up more than his own parents had, there was something underlying that seemed to suggest more than a mentor-mentee relationship. 

 

Their closeness alerted Hux that his presence was unneeded, so he excused himself to peruse the house while the two talked.

 

Hux wandered until he made his way into a wide hall that was covered in family pictures, certificates, medals, and even one of Kylo’s gold records. Hux catalogued each of the pictures, interested in what Kylo had been like when he was younger. There were pictures of him sitting at a piano, playing a guitar, and doing various other musically related things. There were also magazine clippings, written about him when he’d been a prodigy. There were various pictures of Kylo doing martial arts and fencing, something that surprised Hux as he hadn’t taken Kylo for the athletic type. But he supposed that toned body had to come from somewhere. 

 

There was a section of the wall that looked like it was dedicated to the couples of the family - there was a large picture of Anakin with Kylo’s grandmother, Padme. Next to that was a picture of the same size of Kylo’s adoptive maternal grandparents, Bail and Breha. A picture of Leia and Han that looked like it’d been taken in the early 80s followed, and lastly there was a picture of Rey and Jessika. Hux wondered if he and Kylo would ever make it up there. 

 

Continuing down the wall, there was a picture of Kylo standing next to a grinning, curly haired teenager, who Hux belatedly realized was Poe. Next to that was a picture of Kylo, standing outside a science museum and holding a little girl’s hand. His face was obscured by his own hand, which he held over his face to block out the sun, a lit cigarette dangling from his fingers. Hux squinted at the picture and recognized the girl to be Rey. 

 

“He never could fully let us go,” a voice to his side said, and Hux started as he turned to see Leia standing next to him.

 

“Mrs. Organa, pardon me - I didn’t hear you come in,” Hux said apologetically.

 

“It’s fine,” Leia replied.

 

They stood in silence for a few moments before Leia broke the silence. “So, you and Ben are serious?” she asked bluntly, and Hux laughed to himself, seeing where Kylo got his tact (and probably his temper) from. 

 

“Pretty serious,” Hux agreed.

 

“I can tell; he’s never brought anyone home before,” Leia said, sounding a little sad.

 

“Really...well, I’m honored to be here,” Hux said, going over the information in his mind.

 

“You know, I thought your being in the Mafia might complicate things,” Leia said.

 

Hux turned to her, startled. 

 

“Politician, remember? It’s my job to know these things,” Leia said, pointing to herself.

 

“Yes…” Hux said, uncertainly.

 

“But you’re not your father, just like Ben wasn’t his father,” Leia replied, a sad tone to her voice when she mentioned Kylo.

 

“Thank you...and I’m very sorry for your loss,” Hux said, feeling awkward. He was never good with emotions.

 

Leia sighed shakily and nodded her head, giving him a tight lipped smile. “Well...do you want to be up there?” she asked Hux.

 

“Where?” Hux asked, furrowing his brow.

 

Leia gestured to the section of the wall that contained the couple pictures and a smile slowly crept onto Hux’s face.

 

“Yes...yes, I’d quite like that,”

 

~

 

The day had wound down, and Kylo was currently sitting cross legged on his bed in his old room. Leia had insisted he stay and he had no choice but to obey. Hux came in, in a pair of dark satin pyjamas that Kylo would’ve laughed at, had he been in a better mood.

 

“So...your family seems nice,” Hux started, crawling onto the bed and sitting across from Kylo, mirroring his cross legged position.

 

Kylo scoffed and said nothing, but he could tell Hux had something on his mind.

 

“Spit it out,” Kylo snapped.

 

“Kylo...has Snoke ever...I mean - or are you two...or have you been?” Hux started out awkwardly, gesturing with one hand and digging his nails into his palm with the other, a nervous tic Kylo had noticed early on.

 

“Have we been what?” Kylo asked, confused. 

 

“I don’t know....you two just seem very close, is all,” Hux said.

 

Kylo felt his eyes widen as he realized what Hux was implying. “What?! How could you even think that, he’s my mentor...he - he practically raised me!” Kylo said, flopping backwards onto the mattress and rolling onto his side to get out of Hux’s gaze. “I can’t even believe you would ask me something like that,” Kylo said, smashing his face into a pillow. 

 

Kylo heard Hux sigh and felt the bed shift as he lied down next to him. They laid in silence and Kylo figured that Hux had dropped the topic.

 

“You never answered the question,” Hux said, when Kylo was just seconds away from falling asleep.

 

Kylo said nothing and buried his face deeper into the pillow. 

 

~

 

It was early morning and the sunlight streamed into Kylo’s room from an open window, bathing him in gold and making him look divine. They were sitting on the bed in a similar position as yesterday, and Hux decided to pick up where they’d left off yesterday. He was determined to find out what Snoke had been doing to Kylo all these years. Kylo’s silence was all he needed to know that his guesses of what was happening probably weren’t too far off the mark. 

 

“When did it first happen?” Hux asked.

 

Kylo was silent for a few moments before he looked up to meet Hux’s eyes. “When I was 15. He kissed me, I went along with it,” Kylo said candidly.

 

Hux felt like he might be sick. “And the last time it happened?” He asked, taking a swallow and almost not wanting to hear the answer.

 

“Yesterday,” Kylo replied, meeting Hux’s eyes, unashamed.

 

“Kylo...you don’t have to do that,” Hux said, spreading his hands out in front of himself helplessly “you don’t owe him anything,”

 

“I owe him everything,” Kylo corrected, matter-of-a-factly.

 

“Not your body. Not your soul. Not  _ you _ ,” Hux said, as things started to click into place with this new information. 

 

Kylo shrugged and it nearly broke Hux’s heart to see how little he cared for his own well-being. Hux’s mind was going a mile a minute, mulling over the information. His thoughts came to a screeching halt when he remembered Snoke’s words from the previous day -  _ ‘perhaps too long’ _ \- and the way he’d looked at Hux. Snoke was  _ jealous _ . The thought made Hux uneasy - Snoke was not one to be crossed. He’d heard stories of the man destroying careers and lives over one wrong move. And Hux had gotten in the way of someone he’d had total and complete control over for nearly all their life. 

 

Slowly, a plan came together in Hux’s mind and Kylo could tell, because he was watching him wearily. 

 

“Hux, whatever you’re - “ Kylo started.

 

“No,” Hux cut him off “I know how to fix this,” he finished, pushing himself off the bed and getting dressed hurriedly. 

 

Hux knew what he had to do. For Kylo. For him. For  _ them _ .

 

~

 

_ ‘KYLO REN’S LONGTIME MENTOR PASSES AWAY’ _

 

_ ‘FIRST ORDER RECORDS MANAGER DEAD AT AGE 47’ _

 

_ ‘FAMOUS BAND MANAGER DIES UNDER MYSTERIOUS CIRCUMSTANCES’ _

 

Those were the headlines that plastered the papers the day after Snoke was found dead in his home, a single bullet to the chest. 

 

The media and the police scrambled to try and uncover what happened, but they never knew the truth. Hux had made sure of that. He had his family’s most trusted hitman to thank for that. Snoke’s death would be ruled a tragic occurrence, he’d gotten tangled up with the wrong people and they came to take what was theirs. When he couldn’t deliver, they took his life as payment. The perfect story; and believable too. There had always been rumors that Snoke dabbled in the darker parts of life. Drug rings, filthy lucre, prostitution. Hux was sure some would even celebrate his death. Hux knew he would. He’d freed Kylo of Snoke’s unyielding grasp and he’d secured their future together. Everything else was irrelevant.

 

~

 

Kylo was standing in one of a thousand hotel lobbies when he found out, the glass he’d been holding slipping out of his hand and shattering on the tile beneath him as he watched the news report. He heard his phone buzzing repeatedly, but it barely registered to him. 

 

Snoke was dead.

 

His mentor was dead.

 

His  _ abuser _ was dead.

 

He was free.


	6. Epilogue [+ ART]

If you asked Kylo Ren to sum up his life in snapshots, there would be a 4th snapshot now. A picture of Kylo, happy, smiling, Hux’s hand around his waist. They’re both dressed in white linen, the sun setting behind them, Kylo’s hair windswept and Hux looking immaculate as ever, the setting sun turning his hair a fiery copper. It’s their wedding photo, taken on one of the beaches of Hawaii.

 

It had been a long road, but they’d gotten there. Kylo had proposed to Hux only weeks after KNVGHTS tour ended, but between Kylo’s therapy (personal _and_ family) and Hux taking over as the head of First Order Records in the wake of Snoke’s death, their lives had been hectic and emotionally charged to say the least. Rey and Poe had teased Kylo about the two of them getting married (to Jessika and Finn, respectively) before he had, but Kylo didn’t care how long it took him and Hux to make it to the altar, as long as they were together.

 

And when Kylo was finally standing up there, looking out into the smiling faces of his family and friends with the love of his life next to him, he knew that everything he’d been through - every pain, every hardship, every failure, every bad feeling, everything - had all been worth it in the end.

 

_“I think it’s perfect for the wall, don’t you think?”_ Leia asked, snapping Kylo out of his thoughts as she held the picture up to the wall.

 

Kylo wrapped an arm around Hux’s waist, smiling at his husband.

 

“Yes, it’s perfect.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you're seeing this, thank you for reading my fic! I had an amazing time participating in the Kylux Big Bang. And thanks once again to my artist, [iwanttoplayguitar](https://iwanttoplayguitar.tumblr.com), for creating such a beautiful piece of work!


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